As you partake in the global celebration of the Emerald Island, make sure that this green day is filled with giggles and glee! The best way to achieve this is through laughter. For the folks, both young and old, who are looking for some St. Patrick's Day jokes that are pure gold, here are some glowing options that will make you the life of the paddy!
St. Patrick's Day Jokes for Kids
Start your St. Paddy's Day shenanigans off with some laughs! These fun St. Patrick's Day jokes for kids are guaranteed to put a jig in their step and a smile on their face!
Who did Cinderella meet at the St. Patrick's Day ball?
Her Pinch Charming
How do you show off to your date on St. Patrick's Day?
You play the brag-pipes!
What do you call an Irish spider?
Paddy long legs!
What did the Irish potato say to the cabbage?
I hope you have a spud-tacular day!
What is an Irish toddler's favorite nursery rhyme?
What do you get when you order ice cream from a dancing leprechaun?
A shamrock shake!
Why are plants a good gift for a leprechaun?
They all have green thumbs!
How did the leprechaun feel when the Irishman started dancing with his crush?
He was green with envy.
What is a leprechaun's favorite breakfast?
Green eggs and ham with a side of lucky charms.
What did Kermit say to the leprechaun?
It's not that easy being green, except for on St. Paddy's Day!
How do you know if an Irishman thinks your jokes are funny?
He's Dublin over with laughter.
Why should you never take a four-leaf clover to the dry cleaners?
Because you don't want to press your luck!
What happens when you mix a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?
You get a rash of good luck!
What does every Irish deck need?
Who is an Irishman's favorite superhero?
The Green Lantern
What did the four-leaf clover say to the leprechaun?
I be-leaf there is a pot of gold at the end of that rainbow!
Why is St. Patrick's Day a frog's favorite holiday?
Because they are always wearing green!
When does a leprechaun cross the street?
When the light turns green.
What did the goalie say when he blocked the game-winning shot?
What do you get when two leprechauns talk about the weather?
A lot of small talk.
What kind of cash does a leprechaun deposit at the bank?
What do you call a Riverdance gone wrong?
A jig mistake!
What spells does Harry Potter cast on St. Patrick's Day?
Funny St. Patrick's Day Jokes for Adults
Get ready to laugh your shamrocks off with these golden jokes for St. Patrick's Day!
What do a pint of Guinness and the little teapot have in common?
They are both short and stout!
What did St. Patrick say to the snakes?
What did the leprechaun say to M.C. Hammer?
Can't pinch this!
Why should an Irishman never run with bagpipes?
He might get kilt!
What did the gambling Irishman say when he was dealt 11 in blackjack?
I'm Dublin down!
What did the glass of Jameson say to the priest?
I will lift your spirits!
What did the food critic say about the potatoes, corned beef, and onions?
The chef made a right hash of it!
What did the therapist say to the Irish stew?
You have a lot of emotional cabbage.
What did the bartender say to the Irishman who threw out his green beer?
You Seamus all.
Why did U2's Bono fall off the stage?
He was too close to The Edge!
What does a farmer get when his heifer does an Irish jig?
Bailey's Irish Cream!
Did you know that Dwayne Johnson is part-Irish?
He should be called The Sham-Rock!
What did Pink say when she walked into the Irish pub?
Let's get this Paddy started!
What is Katy Perry's favorite song to sing on St. Patrick's Day?
I kissed a leprechaun, and I liked it!
What did the bartender say to the photographer on St. Patrick's Day?
It's a pitcher-perfect day!
Why did the Irishman install solar panels?
Because he was into green living!
What did Chris Brown say to his date at the club on St. Patrick's Day?
Let's Dublin your pleasure, Dublin your fun.
What did the leprechaun meteorologist forecast for St. Patrick's Day?
That the sun will shine like a pot of gold with downpours expected in the afternoon!
St. Patrick's Day Puns
Looking for a caption for your social media post? Try out these clover options!
- Distill my beating heart
- Having a shamrockin' good time!
- Irish you happy St. Patrick's Day!
- Don't worry, beer happy
- Making some pour decisions
- What a brew-tiful day to drink happy thoughts!
- In pursuit of hoppiness
- Reaching a pint of no return
- Paddying like a rockstar
- Zero lucks given
- Cutest clover in the patch
- That's a bunch of blarney!
Get Giggling This St. Patrick's Day
St. Patrick's Day jokes are a great way to break the ice at school parties, over a drink, at a parade, or while enjoying some corned beef and cabbage with friends and family. For the kids looking to make the most out of these quips and witticisms, consider having them add these remarks to coloring pages and then give them to others! This can be a great holiday activity and a wonderful way to spread some joy. Don't you a-green?